Dreamstate

I had one of those dreams last night. You know, the kind that is just so good, so emotionally inspired, and so tangible that once you wake up, you know it will follow you the rest of the day? Yeah, one of those. A part of me loves these dreams. They have the capability to fill me with hope for what’s to come, and to feel privileged that I at least got to live it out in my head if nowhere else.

But oftentimes these dreams are a source of pain for me. A perfect scenario that felt so real in my mind, but wasn’t, can be a form of torture, especially when it’s the one thing you pray for every single day. When it’s the one thing you’ve been assured will never happen. When it’s the one thing you’d be willing to give up almost anything for.

I know I’m young, I’m reminded of this all too often, but really, what difference does that make? Does it make these things any easier knowing I potentially have decades ahead of me? Does it make my dreams, my feelings, any less real? Of course not.

So, what can I do about it? I can keep praying. I can be grateful for a dream that gave me joy while it lasted. And I can do my best to let it go.

But that dream state sure does cloud your mind…